Results day.

It's here. 10 hours from now I'll be leaving my house and making that last walk up to my sixth form to collect my results. How do I feel? I'm not sure. These past two years have been a wild rush of emotions, filled with happiness, rejection, acceptance, triumph and constant WORRY. 

One thing I am happy about is how hard I've tried. I genuinely feel like I gave it my ALL. No more preparation, no additional late nights, no extra practice N O T H I N G would have given me that extra edge. Obviously I feel like I could have done more DURING the actual exams, but in terms of preparation I really gave it my all. The thing is, the exam does not for any instance reflect how hard you've worked, how much passion you've had, how much effort you've put in for that subject. Not at all. I know people who have barely tried throughout the two years, yet aced their exams. On the other hand, I know people who have stressed, worried, worked, burdened themselves, yet still not achieved what they deserve. It's subjective. How your exam goes is affected by so many other factors. Maybe the broken sleep you had before will hinder you, or maybe where you sit in the exam hall may put you off. Preparation, although incredibly important, is only a factor. Of course you can do things to increase odds, however that day you sit your exam really does rely on a perfect balance of harmony between you and the questions asked before you.

In my case, I feel my exams generally went well. Better than last year for a fact. The last one in particular, was beautiful, everything I'd wished for. But who knows? I leave it to Gods hands now, I've learnt the moment I firmly believe that he has preordained all matters, it is then, and only then, where I will be at ease.

Tomorrow.

Bring it.